I’ve found Jesus! The Lord is with me and He guides my every step. Nevermore shall I suffer loneliness, depravation or despair for He is with me at all times, carrying me along my way and into the light.

What would Steve do?

Oh wait! Never mind, it’s only Steve

I’ve just returned from a trip to Sweden and I’ve learnt quite a few things there. Swedes seem to not only have no use for doorbells, they also enjoy stuffing their faces with small pillows of tobacco (snus). It enriches their saliva with what can only be described as disgusting gunk and is readily discharged via the mouth and left in the street when depleted. This leaves the, otherwise fairly clean streets of Stockholm filled with little objects that look like non-lethal ammunition and the keen observer with the odd feeling that there’s just been a raging war with no casualties whatsoever.

They lodge the snus under the upper lip, thereby disfiguring themselves to such a degree that tourists must think the blond, tall, and pretty Swedes are all exported to beaches around the world. All that’s left is Sven Överbite and his pillow of gunk. How any sane human being could possibly enjoy such a disgusting habit is beyond me.

The next interesting tidbit of information I was able to gather is the following: Always observe what the weird guy sitting across from you on the subway-quad is doing. You do not want to be surprised by what is … ejected. Mercifully I didn’t have to find this out „the hard way“ as it were, but by way of a gruesome tale related to me one dark, scary night.

Another thing I picked up is that time machines exist, work quite well and are apparently made in Taiwan. The flash doesn’t always go off.

The lady in the seat in front of me is reading the most uninterestingly irrelevant magazine I have ever had the misfortune to lay eyes on. Something about Rhianna (?) not caring enough about her tour-mate and Heidi Kl… Never mind, I’m getting bored just thinking about it.

Right, now approaching TXL, initiating landing sequence. Should this be the last thing I ever write (in which case no one will ever read it, so if you do, it isn’t), let this be said: Going out watching Pluto Goofy, Mickey Mouse Donald Duck’s antics in a caravan in the in-flight movie is bliss.